Belch like a drunkard, snort like a baby gazelle

An Assyrian sleeping spell from the British Museum’s Ashurpanipal’s Library project:

Belch like a drunkard, snort like a baby gazelle, until your mother comes, strokes you, and picks you up. (ME K.9171)

Of quotable things I saw this barely beat out one of the Egyptians room’s ‘consorts with crocodiles’ description of a fisherman’s life.