You are the drain pipe of my soul, you inattentive and indulgent confessor

From Joris-Karl Huysmans’ Là-bas, the main character addressing his cat:

“In spite of your kill-joy character and your single track mind you testy, old bachelor, you are a very nice cat,” said Durtal, in an insinuating, wheedling tone. “Then too, for many years now, I have told you what one tells no man. You are the drain pipe of my soul, you inattentive and indulgent confessor. Never shocked, you vaguely approve the mental misdeeds which I confess to you. You let me relieve myself and you don’t charge me anything for the service. Frankly, that is what you are here for. I spoil you with care and attentions because you are the spiritual vent of solitude and celibacy, but that doesn’t prevent you, with your spiteful way of looking at me, from being insufferable at times, as you are today, for instance!”

Malgré ton caractère de rabat-joie, de vieux garçon monomane et sans patience, tu es tout de même gentil, fit Durtal, d’un ton insinuant, pour l’amadouer ; puis, il y a assez longtemps que je te raconte ce que chacun se tait ; tu es l’évier de mon âme, toi, le confesseur inattentif et indulgent qui approuve, vaguement, sans surprise, les méfaits d’esprit qu’on lui avoue, afin de se soulager, sans qu’il en coûte ! Au fond, c’est là ta raison d’être, tu es l’exutoire spirituel de la solitude et du célibat ; aussi, je te gave d’attentions et de soins ; mais cela n’empêche qu’avec tes bouderies tu ne sois souvent, ainsi que ce matin, par exemple, insupportable